Happily In Love & Approaching Your WeddingDay

You are happily in love and things are rolling right along towards your big day. But have you had the important conversation about love? Have you discussed how you like to be shown love? What does that even mean?

Of course not!! How many of us actually learn how to talk about how we like to receive love?? Less then 1% of people is my guess.

We are missing the mark on learning how to communicate through talking to one another in this digital world. So it seems quite silly to ask if you have ‘discussed’ something as critical as your “Love Language”.

What does that even mean to you? Do you know how you like to be shown love? Is it through gifts or touch?

There is a book, a free assessment and so much more info to help people with communicating their love.

This is especially good info for those on their way to the alter. For every single bride that I come in contact with, this is the first resource I suggest to her. This might seem strange when I am supporting brides to look and feel their absolute best for their big day and beyond. But it really does make sense. Your emotional well-being is a huge part of your overall health and happiness. Certainly the ‘wedding day’ is the most important and special day in your life (thus far), but it really is about creating a healthy and happy environment for all of the days that follow. Emotional health, is linked to receiving love and feeling confident in the love you experience from your significant other and in my opinion health is holistic; thus this book.

For those of us who have been married for a while looking to keep the relationship strong, this book is amazing. I wish that we had been introduced to it before we were married, because I believe it would have made us even stronger in our communication and in how we appreciate one another.

Honestly, this could even be a huge key to the dating scene for those still in that mode. Imagine if you could understand early on how the person you are dating receiving love so you can score so many more emotional points with that person?! This could truly make you look like a genius to the person you are with…show them love in the way that they like to receive it. It’s brilliant!

The book is called the 5 Love Languages. It is an easy, straightforward read that I put into the hands of my spouse last year for the first time. I devoured the info in approximately 2 days and found a unique opportunity to share it with him when the internet and cable was not working in our house. Sometimes you have to look for the right time. But for those of you reading this who are engaged to be married, there is no better time than the present to read this book. Don’t spend another moment planning the ‘big day’ until you have taken the time to figure out how to show love to the person you are planning to spend the rest of your time with.

I truly believe Gary Chapman is a genius. He should be a billionaire in my opinion. His book is one that every single person who is entering into marriage should own, read and know. In this world where the stat is that ____ % of people will experience a divorce, wouldn’t it make sense to read a book which clearly and blatantly outlines how to show love to the person you love?? I would say “Sign me up for that” immediately if I were you.

I highly recommend heading over to the 5 Love Languages and ordering the book as well as taking the quiz for yourself. Honestly, when I was reading and even taking the quiz, I was unsure of which ‘language’ truly was my own love language. I appreciate so many things that my husband does and am fortunate that he demonstrates love in a number of ways.

Chapman breaks your love language down into 5 different categories: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. Do you think that knowing this information about your partner could mean a stronger relationship?

I love that it takes the guess work out of what is really important to my spouse. Instead of firing multiple arrows at a target, hoping to hit somewhere close to the bullseye, I can aim right for what matters most, and so can you.

Have you ever experienced a couple where the hubby keeps bringing home gifts to his wife and she is frustrated by it? This is why this book is so amazing. The hubby thinks that this is how she likes to be shown love. He is bringing gifts because it is how he shows his appreciation for her OR perhaps it is the way he likes to be shown love when in fact the gifts are the last thing on her mind and might even make her upset. Taking the time to really understand your own love language is beneficial also. Then when your partner actually shows you love in that way, it is imperative, and I mean imperative that you communicate your appreciation for it. We are human and we thrive with positive encouragement. So if you want something to continue, recognizing it is necessary and time well spent.

If you want to have a deeper connection with your significant other, this book is a must read.

I receive zero commission for the endorsement of this book. It has helped many people in so many ways and if I can help any of my brides to experience greater happiness and long term love and in their marriage that is my goal.

In my opinion, feeling radiant and healthy has a direct link to the deepness in love you experience. Love yourself enough to know your Love Language and love your partner enough to figure out what theirs is. This is a great investment of your time for your health, your marriage and your future!

The Beautiful Art of Snuggling for Wedding Couples

In this crazy busy time of planning a wedding, we sometimes forget the importance of simply being with the person we love. It can be easy to neglect the connection that brought you together in the first place, especially when your mind is so full of everything else. However, you are not alone, as many couples feel this sort of tension during the planning process. But why do weddings tend to start so many fights? Well, the most common reason is money. 1 in 5 couples spend more than $30, 000 on their wedding, so it’s really no surprise that what’s in the bank can often become the source of more than a few arguments. Money is not the sole agitator though; brides often speak about fighting spurred by family involvement, religion, past arguments, and the other parties (A.K.A. bachelor and bachelorette parties). This is perfectly understandable! These are problems that CAN be solved, and that every married couple has faced together – and there are many ways to help get past issues like these. When planning a wedding it is so important not to forget to spend time with our partners, to reconnect, de-stress, and just fill up our love-buckets!

So now this brings about the question, “How can my partner and I manage all this stress?”. Well there are a TON of options for you! Psychologists discussing the keys to a healthy and happy relationship say that step one is to acknowledge your relationship and to continue to work on it. Your relationship is like a garden, and so it must be tended! You have to spend time together in order to grow as a couple, but you also have to recognize the importance of personal space. Remember that this is a life-long commitment, and so it’s vital to be honest with each other, and speak your mind clearly and rationally, without jumping to conclusions. Allow your partner to see that you are hearing them, and that you respect their voice. This is what step two is all about, communication! Working through these problems as a team is the best way to handle them in the long run, and you’ll both be glad to have talked it out. However, together sometimes, you will have to accept that some problems just can’t be solved, and that the best way to deal with this is to accept your differences. Torn between red velvet and classic vanilla for the cake? Make each tier a different flavour! Can’t agree on a honeymoon destination? Talk it out to find something you BOTH want out of your honeymoon, and figure where you can best achieve that! See these problems as challenges that make your relationship stronger in the end.

The solution we really want to address here today, however, is the importance of snuggling! How does this relate to wedding planning stress? Well, cuddles are a quick, simple, and most importantly an effective way to ease the wedding tension between you and your fiancé. We affect each other energetically, both with touch and without it, and a loving touch is incredibly powerful and soothing. Just a hug from your partner can bring comfort, joy, and calm you down. Did you know that touch is the very first sense that we develop, and as we age, our sense of touch is one of our last to fade? As humans we feel things everyday – every second of everyday – and this can affect us in many ways. A positive touch can, 1. Increase oxytocin, which helps us feel connected to the world around us, and makes our bodies feel great, 2. Decrease cortisol, a stress hormone the decreases productivity and induces anxiety, and 3. Trigger dopamine, a pleasure hormone. This is all a part of one single positive touch, so just imagine what 15 minutes of cuddling can do for you!

What’s our suggestion? One of the ways that my husband and I connected before the wedding was to put on a movie or a baseball game and snuggle up together. It was a favourite time for us to just be. Turn the lights down low – maybe even light the fireplace if have one or just light a few candles because its all about the mood. Put on some comfy clothes and grab a cozy blanket (or a few!), and settle in together to watch a movie or listen to whatever music you like! We recommend IMDB’s list of “Romantic Comedies/ Dramas that are Worth Watching”, which contains titles like Pretty Woman, A Walk to Remember, Life as we Know it, The Princess Bride and many, MANY more (here’s a link to get you started http://www. imdb.com/list/ls058377339/ ).

Remember that snuggling is more than just being with the one you love, but also about creating a positive connection that fosters a happy relationship consistently. But, just one time won’t do the trick! Earlier we talked about tending to your relationship like a garden, and the same goes here too! Make sure you’re making time to bond and just be with your fiancé throughout the wedding planning time, the two of you will experience together the business and stress, but more importantly together you will grow from it and grow stronger roots as a couple.

Wedding Couples You Are Worth It

We are all about self-worth, self-love and the plea to recognise where you are at so you can step into the light of your incredible, radiant beauty as a woman.

Let’s be really honest right from the start.

Are you someone who puts everyone’s needs ahead of your own?

Are you often seen as motherly, maternal, or extremely thoughtful?

These are extremely wonderful qualities, please recognize that.

In my experience however, these qualities are often (not always, but often) found in individuals whose own self-worth might be lower. And much of the time, these individuals don’t even recognize this issue.

I know this because I was this person for most of my life.

I can relate to going above and beyond for everyone else, all of the time. I can relate to putting my own needs at the absolute bottom of the totem pole and I always disguised this as my desire to love, care for, help and serve others.

These qualities are all necessary in life and great qualities to have, and I am grateful to be a person who cares deeply for others, but I have come to truly realize that my own worth and self-care doesn’t have to come at the expense of other’s needs. I need to love myself as well. Just as you do.

Can you relate to this?

Perhaps if you have never stopped to reflect on this point, you may be feeling some resistance to this opinion. That is ok. It may or may not apply to you. It may apply to someone you know, and is simply my opinion and experience. However, I have seen this on countless occasions. Sit with this thought for a while and reflect for yourself on the following:

> Am I making breakfast, lunch, dinner for everyone else around me, and often forgetting to feed myself? Or choosing less then quality options because ‘those options’ are for others whose health is worth more than mine/more important than mine?

> Am I overscheduled, overbooked, running myself ragged with the thought that ‘everyone needs me’, when in reality I could be of more service if I chose a few less things and took better care of myself?

>Am I taking care of my own physical needs as I should or are things like showering, eating, grooming, physical activity, time for relaxation etc taking a back seat because I am so busy serving and helping others?

> Do I feel I am worthy of personal time so I can rejuvenate?

> Is my health and physical wellbeing worth investing in with time, energy and money? Or am I not worth those things?

How do these questions make you feel?

What I have come to realize is that I am worthy of everything I desire, just as you are.

I am worth taking care of because I want to lead a long and healthy life. I am worth feeling healthy, happy and vibrant, because when I am in this state I am truly a better person in all aspects of my life and can be of real service to others.

All too often I hear women say that they are unsure or uncomfortable spending money or time on health or wellness related experiences (like gym memberships, running club fees, yoga classes) or health products, when they have no problem spending the money on other areas that do not relate to their self-care, which in my opinion is directly linked to their level of self-worth and self-love and a huge red flag.

I always think, isn’t that interesting. If only she knew she was worth it. If only she knew that taking care of herself in all manners of wellness is a greater gift then all of the gifts she can give to those around her. Because we all know that when we are feeling good in mind, body and spirit we can share that optimal self with those around us.

But for some reason we have been taught to second guess our own worth. I don’t know when this happens.

I just know that when individuals realize that they are worth investing time, energy and money in, the benefits are astronomical and the growth is extraordinary.

This ties greatly into improving the loving relationship you have with yourself. It is a factor in why the RHB program was created.

I wanted to encourage all brides-to-be to consider, reflect on, remember and embrace their need for self-love. It is my sincere belief that when we truly love ourselves and can be at peace with who we are more and more, we can really love those around us, we can be a Radiant Wife! When we stop comparing and criticizing ourselves (skills taught to us every single day through media), we can be more loving to ourselves and in turn more loving to those around us.

Our level of self-love is directly linked to our level of self-worth in my opinion. The challenge is to help individuals to realize that these two areas are in need of constant practice. We must care for ourselves like we care for others. Our talents of service, must not only be for others.

Some might feel as though this feels awkward. It will be at first as you transition to a place of greater self-love and self-worth. Some might feel as though I am encouraging you to be self-centred. This is not my intention. It is my sincere belief that a person can have great self-love and understand their own self-worth deeply, without becoming focused only on themselves. It is the opposite in fact.

I believe a person who is happy and content with themselves, showing greater self-love through personal care and personal time has more space, time and love in their life to give to others because they aren’t wasting their time worrying about what others think (as often) and are not caught up in the comparison game (as often). This is a process of practice.

Where is your level of self-love today? Where is your level of self-worth?

Can these be improved? In this program, we dive into some amazing reflection exercises to help you strengthen these areas.

Step up for yourself today, because you are worthy. We all are.

Sending you radiant love and health,